Archive for June 12th, 2007

Dentistry

Here’s a random thought for the morning… I should consider dentistry as a hobby. I’m serious – with the effort that it takes to cradle the patients that come through our facilities – it’s like pulling teeth!

Many will call in with a vary vague purpose – to schedule an appointment, or get a prescription refill – but don’t know what clinic they are supposed to be going to, or what drugs they are supposed to be taking (“I don’t know the name, and I’ve already thrown the bottle out. By the way, it’s my blood pressure pill and my insulin and I’ve been out both for a couple of days. So despite the fact that you ask for up to seventy-two hours to process prescriptions, and it’s currently 4:45 on a Friday afternoon, before a three-day weekend, is there any way you can have that called in today?”)…

So, we go through all of the hoops, and ask all of the questions imaginable for their situation (often repeating them several times since the patient is usually only half paying attention, and also depending on the specific line that was called in the first place)… and it often boils down to the patient having the information (as is the case with a lot of appointment requests) in their hand as to which office they need to speak with, but taking five minutes for them to figure out the text of the letter (especially when they initially want to deny that the information is there).

Dentistry… pulling teeth… gah!!!

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Terrible Tues(day)…

Today, I am confused…

Everything started out well enough… I woke up (which is always a good way to start things out), made to work on time… but everything else seems to have slid slowly downhill from there. I was in bed shortly after eleven last night (which is actually about normal for me), so I got my usual amount of sleep…

My situation has boiled down to this: I am mentally lethargic, and in a general *blah* mood, and have been for most of the morning since coming to work. Here in the last little bit (within the last half-hour or so) part of my mental state has gone completely south – spelunking to dark caverns and places that I haven’t really visited in months. After a brief glance at my watch, I notice the date, and am not really all that surprised by some of the travels my mind has taken, but it is surprising to me how dark some of the journeys have been…

And my motivation is in question, now, as well… There are projects and interests that I have had for years that I’m not sweating now – even having the time to devote to them, I just can’t motivate myself to go to them (writing, working at learning bass & drums, exploring some photography options, cycling…) Hell, I’ve barely been able to motivate myself to clean the house (mostly to make it presentable for people to visit, but not out of my own concerns about being in the space…)

As for the sleep thing… I’m struggling a bit this morning. As I really try to think about it, I’ve cut out most of the (caffinated) sodas, sticking mostly with teas or water (but as I focus, I guess I am a bit on the dehydrated side, which doesn’t help fight the funk), and the occasional non-caf drinks (Sprite or root beer).

Part of the dark thoughts revolver around the last couple of months – reflecting a lot over choices that have been made. While I am comfortable with the more monumental decisions (to start seeing people/going out again, specifically), there are moments when I can’t help but second (and third, and fourth, and fifth, and…) guess myself on the whos and whys, dancing on that razor’s edge of avoiding getting too attached too quickly while still trying to express interest… A delicate dance that can play hell with the psyche, I’m finding out…

The only constant uplifter for my, lately, has been just listening to music – but even that can get dangerous (and I haven’t really even pursued it like I previously had…)

Part depression, part dehydration, part self-dejection… This is the kind of stuff that should be making up a Monday, but it’s kinda fitting (in an ironic twist) that it’s all hitting on a Tuesday… Terrible, isn’t it…?

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